Learning lessons from the “hot stove” example

26 Mar

I’ve mentioned numerous times in the past that in addition to the Lama Pai theory I learned from Chan Tai-San, another major influence on my strategic thinking when it came to fighting came from US sanshou pioneer, fighter and coach Jason Yee. One of the examples he used, when in international fighting, many of the fighters (especially the Russian and former Soviet Union fighters) had to be treated like a “hot stove”. You touched them (scored points) quickly and quickly retracted. Over the years, this example proved very useful, and thinking of the “hot stove” expanded in my own mind into a wide number of useful examples in training my fighters.

hqdefault

I frequently pose this question to my students; why do you not touch the hot stove? With a facility in New York City, my student population is literally international. However, regardless of where you were raised, in what country, in what culture and in what language, that answer is remarkably the same. Your mother told you not to touch the hot stove, but you touched it anyway! The burn, the pain, the NEGATIVE EXPERIENCE is why you don’t touch the hot stove!

hotstove

I use this example of the “hot stove”, the negative experience, in explaining the psychology behind what the Fairtex camp used to call “nothing for free” (or “don’t get mad, get even!”). We don’t just block, we ALWAYS counter! We don’t just block and counter, we use blocks that “destroy”. Your opponent should quickly learn that anytime they attack you, any time they come near you, there are very real chances of pain. Psychologically, you become that hot stove.

left kick

Another example of the “hot stove”, very much in Jason Yee’s original vein, is the idea that when we do touch the hot stove, we don’t stand there, analyse the pain and ponder a response. WE ACT QUICKLY! WE RETRACT QUICKLY! That is why we must drill out counter attacks until they are second nature. They must be quick and natural, just like we retract from the pain of a hot stove!

Dreaming in the clouds…

25 Mar

I found out last week that Stephen Laurette, the man who introduced me to Chan Tai-San, had passed away. I haven’t spoken to Stephen in twenty years, but I know he was a remarkable, intelligent man, dedicated to education, and loved both Chinese culture and Chinese martial arts. Also, I remain the official representative of Chan Tai-San’s organization, even a decade after he has passed away. So down to Chinatown I went, to arrange for the flowers.

483686_3932841940000_1234203405_n

By now, I should be used to the drills. As soon as I began writing the Chinese to go on the flowers, everyone in the shop began talking to me. Of course, they also told me how famous Chan Tai-San was, how everyone in the south, particularly Toi-San knows him. I’ve heard it all a thousand times before.

135651_1395832836358_3045419_o

There was a time when I lived in Chinatown. Today I rarely find myself there. Yet speaking Guangdonghua, writing out the characters, talking about Chan Tai-San and, of course, thinking about Laurette, all drew my mind back to another time. How strange that a completely white person still feels so comfortable among Chinese, speaking a peculiar sub dialect of not even the mainstream Chinese language?

2702_81552070559_3927413_n

Then gradually I was drawn out of my dreaming. I walked up to a dim sum place where I had frequently met Chan Tai San over the years. Frequently I met him as early as 8 in the morning. I’d walk in and he’d already be sitting there with friends of his, such as my “uncle” the Choy Lay Fut teacher and the ON Leong representative I had gotten to know. I pulled on the door, and it was locked! They don’t even open until 11 am these days…. 11 am?

kahpchoih

So I walked half a block to the small place that sits beneath the Chan Family Association building where I first trained with Chan Tai-San. Back then it was a dingy (I use that word with AFFECTION!) old place staffed by old, grumpy but efficient Toi San men. I walked in to find it had been remodeled. It was bright and clean, and… boring.. and staffed now by giggly young women…..

thirteen

Ha Jeung? You can’t get that on a Monday. Now they only make it on weekends. Polei Cha? You really want that? When I was studying those early years with Chan Tai-San, my classmates and I were the only non Chinese eating dim sum. Now the place is packed with tourists?

602138_3932924622067_1879111743_n

You can never really go home, never really…..

Believe in yourself

1 Mar

If you’ve never felt sick, never had doubt, never experienced fear, if you’re healthy, if you’re successful and if you have everything you want in life STOP READING RIGHT NOW… this blogg is not for you.

29271_1204843501744_905577_n

Diagnosed with Leukemia at age six, I was as weak and sick from the treatment as I was from the disease. I had missed a year of school. This is the time when most children learn to play sports. I participated in none of that. Somehow? Luck? Chance? Fate? I found the martial arts.

388784_2069168709334_1263237810_n

Chemotherapy and radiation results in nerve damage, doctors told my parents I would never be able to lift my knee above my waist. I was lucky, they never told me, so I never knew I “couldn’t do that.”

68172_3465554298101_1690923881_n

Doing martial arts taught me important lessons about life. Nothing is impossible if you believe in yourself and are willing to do the work. The path is simple, but not easy. But if you keep working toward your goal, you WILL achieve it. At times, you learn to make pain your friend. That is why I believe in the martial arts, believe everyone benefits from them, and have thus taught them for most of my life to others.

pkkim school

Eventually, I also discovered that the lessons of life, that we have found in other sources, also need at times to be applied to your martial arts practice. Like Yin and Yang, the relationship is a two way street. It’s all about achieving a balance. As I previously blogged, you need to always train martial arts with truth. You also need to realize that every person is like a snow flake. Everyone wants and NEEDS something different. Not everyone wants to be a fighter. Some people are healthier and fitter than others. You NEED to address and accommodate all these factors.

Me%20Dave%20Chris%20Stephen%20for%20web%201

Over the years, having faced my own personal challenges and overcome them, I’ve developed this worldview. It is NOT the fortune cookie wisdom of traditional martial arts. It is practical experience gained from my personal life. A fusion of the REAL traditions with a modern progressivism. Today, it informs every aspect of my martial arts program.

NOW TRAIN!
SIFU
http://www.nybestkickboxing.com/index.php

Perspectives on the Role of Practical Fighting in Chinese Martial Arts, Part 3

26 Feb

nybestkickboxing:

Re posting this one

Originally posted on nysanda:

“You Keep Using That Word,
I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means”

This is part of my continuing series of articles discussing the practical training and application of Chinese martial arts. While their intent is not to insult, they are indeed intended to make the reader reexamine what they practice and how they practice it.

In conversations involving martial artists all you have to do is bring up boxing, kickboxing, Muay Thai (Thai boxing), wrestling or mixed martial arts and the inevitable response will always be “those are sports.” In most cases, when a martial artist uses the term “sport” it is in a pejorative connotation. Some explanations are just silly. Others have more thought out responses; that they have a referee, rules regarding what can and can not be done, “safe” venues, no weapons, etc. My initial response to all of these is usually the…

View original 393 more words

Use truth as your path…

23 Feb

People who know me from the internet tend to think of me as that somewhat abrasive guy who does nothing but talk about fighting. I certainly talk a lot about fighting, and I’ve trained a lot of people to fight in various combat sports. But in a school that has around a thousand members, these competitive athletes are less than 5% of the population. And that was true even when I was at the height of my fighter training career.

393988_2069153908964_1327971762_n

Every day, six days a week, I teach classes and train the majority of my student body. Most of them don’t have any interest in competitive fighting, many don’t even want to do contact at all. By far, the vast majority of my time is spent helping people achieve their goals; both physical and mental. I help people to be healthier, to look better and most importantly to feel better. Feeling better is both a physical state and a mental state. I am a firm believer, what is the point of having a strong body but a weak mind?

175436_1437853806856_2722356_o

The point I am going to make with today’s blog is that I use the same methods and philosophy to train both my athletes and my so called “normal students.” Reality is, LIFE IS A FIGHT. You have to be prepared for resistance, you have to overcome obstacles, you have to work hard and you have to face your fears and your self doubt. I said this in the clip below;

Integrally related to this is the concept that the ONLY WAY to do this all is to do it with truth. A responsible coach doesn’t put an athlete in a match without the proper preparation. A responsible coach doesn’t lead an athlete to think they are better than they really are. Certainly a responsible coach wouldn’t teach fake skills to an athlete and thus set them up for a beating in a match. As in all things, truth is always the correct path and you should always do the right thing.

298859_2270909165612_1958421570_n

Unfortunately, all too often in the martial arts community I see quite the opposite. We talk a lot about personal development, developing values, being better people. Then instructors try to teach things they aren’t qualified to teach. They teach watered down or just plain fake “skills” to people. Rather than being honest with their students, challenging them to make REAL EFFORTS, and as their coach being there and being accountable for being part of the process; they have found it easier to lie to them, to give fake praise, and to puff up their egos.

914141_10151566283939643_920286929_o

I can tell you from years of experience, the path of truth WORKS. It’s a simple concept, but simple doesn’t mean easy. It’s not easy, it’s difficult. But anything worth having is worth the effort to attain it.

Visit me;
http://www.nybestkickboxing.com/index.php
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSntVrfUYmjl6d_hkM76KQg
https://twitter.com/kickboxingnyc
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1535723596692248/

Eight pillars to success…

22 Feb

A cold rain fell onto me as I stood on the sidewalk, watching the contents of my martial arts school being loaded into a moving van. It was December 2009, and after twenty years of teaching, my school was for the first time just closed. I’d trained thousands of students, including fighters who had held world titles. I’d been the adopted disciple of a world famous teacher, traveling with him and sharing his exclusive circle of friends. I’d published articles, created instructional DVD’s, been featured on national television. But at that moment, it all seemed to be over. We weren’t moving. The contents were simply going to a storage facility on the west side of Manhattan.

My landlord ripped the building down around me to get me to leave.

My landlord ripped the building down around me to get me to leave.

My wife helped me load a few more personal items into a rented car. She initiated a conversation, asking me “so are you going to teach on Monday?” Then she abruptly stopped, aware that I didn’t have an answer. I had no idea what I was going to do. I was also over $100,000 in debt at the time. But 2009 will forever remain in my mind for yet another reason, we had lost a child. 2009 was the year I seriously considered killing myself.

Pretty serious stuff, yet I sit here today writing this. Just three years later, I received a plague from an industry body congratulating me for having one of the top performing schools in the country. I also added a number of new victories in combat sports and yet another MMA championship title to my school’s list of accomplishments. Today, I actually have the largest and most successful school I’ve ever had. I am also out of debt and quite happy with my life.

972305_4543446164724_1472206408_n

In retrospect, this had not been the first challenge in my life. It wasn’t even the most serious. At the age of six, I had been diagnosed with Leukemia. Of course, I didn’t know this at the time, but 50% of the children diagnosed with Leukemia at that time died. My father, a medical doctor, knew this and when I was adult I would hear about how my father had gone to my grandparents’ house to cry and throw things. Those children that survived weren’t exactly expected to lead a normal life either. The chemotherapy and radiation treatments resulted in nerve damage. I am medically not supposed to be able to lift my knee above the height of my waist. Fortunately, no one told me this, so I never knew I was doing the “impossible.”

29271_1204843501744_905577_n

I came to a conclusion a while ago, it is how you decide to tell your story. I could give you this laundry list of bad luck and tragedy and leave it there for you to sympathize with me. Or I could continue the story and inform you that I overcame each and every one of these challenges and came back better, stronger and more focused. My childhood illness was just the beginning of my journey. It was the inspiration for my worldview, which I want to share with the world.

MORE TO COME

Visit me;
http://www.nybestkickboxing.com/index.php
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSntVrfUYmjl6d_hkM76KQg
https://twitter.com/kickboxingnyc
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1535723596692248/

My dream and my vision

22 Feb

Full disclosure and absolute honesty, even brutal honesty. That is the way I do things. I’ve been doing martial arts almost my entire life, and I’ve been a teacher almost my entire adult life. But I wasn’t much of a business man, in some respects a pretty terrible one actually, until I started listening to Michael Parrella (http://www.mikeparrella.com) in 2009. Through Michael, I also met Bedros Keuilian (http://www.keuilian.com/), who has also been very influential upon me. I consider myself a very lucky person, and I have placed direct links to them so they not only get credit, but so you too can seek out their guidance.

active

Today, I run what would be considered a successful martial arts school. It is a nice complement to my many years of developing ways to teach real martial arts to average people, my success training fighters and my efforts to publish historically accurate information on the martial arts in general. I’m a very lucky person. I should be thankful every day for what I have and to those who helped me have this life.

10860988_10152544559291734_2433242917675760196_o

This weekend, I attended Michael’s “MABS 2015.” That is short for martial arts business summit (https://www.martialartsbusinesssummit.com/). I have been very vocal about the fact that I avoid the traditional martial arts industry events like the plague. I have stated many times that I find much of what is passed off in those events utter crap, or to quote Michael himself “same shit in a different box.”

577238_2917589879333_329426398_n

So it shouldn’t really be a surprise I go to Michael’s events, except when you consider that I’ve been exposed to Michael’s wisdom for almost six years now. Sure, there are often new speakers at these events, but CLEARLY there are times when material being presented I already have heard, implemented and understand. BUT THERE ARE ENTIRELY DIFFERENT REASONS I GO TO THESE EVENTS.

68172_3465554298101_1690923881_n

These events always re focus me. They charge me up. They fire me up. I sometimes feel like an old clock, at times I need to be wound up again. Another thing they most definitely do is help me focus my dream and my vision.

14643_1098175355107_1079128_n

I’ve taught thousands of students since 1988. I’ve taught hundreds of seminars. I have instructional DVD’s. I recently published my first book (https://www.createspace.com/4891253). I’ve had an internet presence for over a decade. On this blog, my former blog, internet forums, etc I’ve shared many of my views and beliefs. BUT THIS WEEKEND I REALIZED THAT I HAD YET TO MAKE ONE, UNIFIED STATEMENT OF MY DREAM AND MY VISION. And that is what precisely this weekend hammered at me.

972305_4543446164724_1472206408_n

In the past, I’ve fallen victim to the myth of “perfect action.” I’ve had big ideas that weren’t focused and projects that weren’t thought completely through. I’ve also changed my opinions on things over the years. In summary, I am as human as anyone. So I am NOT promising something specific just yet, other than to say the next few blogs here will be a clear, concise and UNIFIED statement of my dream and my vision. I hope you will tune in, and I hope I can perhaps inspire you just as I have been inspired by others.

Visit me;
http://www.nybestkickboxing.com/index.php
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSntVrfUYmjl6d_hkM76KQg
https://twitter.com/kickboxingnyc
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1535723596692248/

Advice on how not to be “that guy”

16 Feb

This is just some friendly advice on how not to be “that guy” when you enter a martial arts school. Hey! It IS a free country, and you CAN do what you want, but I’m telling you things are probably not how you perceive them to be.

xcitefun@yahoogroups.com_1

— Don’t be a nuisance. Don’t show up an hour early or without an appointment. And if you do, don’t expect an instructor who is teaching class to ignore his class to chat with you or amuse you. Don’t just walk onto a training floor, or pick up something, or start hitting a bag. —

eurotrash

— Don’t lie and don’t exaggerate. Don’t go on about ALL that martial arts training you’ve had, unless it is true. Nothing is more amusing for an instructor than watching the big mouth now struggle through the warm up, have no clue how to execute the basic techniques and/or getting punched in the face by the newbie. You’ll forever be branded a clown (rightfully so) and even if you join, no one will ever take you seriously. —

4257448568_573f9748d6

— Don’t walk into a martial arts school and say you don’t want to take classes, you just want to hit a bag. If you just want to hit a bag, get a bag and hang it in your basement. BUT you’ll end up looking like the guy in the clip below. —

— Don’t walk in wearing every piece of cliche martial arts clothing known to man, especially don’t wear stuff from another martial arts school. Honestly, if you are so in love with the school across town you should stay there. —

HU22O

— Don’t tell the instructor you are training somewhere else and just want to learn some stuff from him but not be a real member. First of all, if that is what you are really trying to do, YOU ARE A PRICK. Second, if that is what you are really doing, chances are you will be the “green light special”.. and I won’t even explain to you what that means. —

l_9e8195da55751280e23620051c47cd06

— Don’t talk about how you want to fight, win titles and be a champion. If you really wanted to do that, you’d shut up, sign up and train hard. Flapping your gums about it is just about the surest indication it is all bullsh-t. —

10 things you probably didn’t know about David Ross of NY San Da

14 Feb

10 things you probably didn’t know about David Ross of New York San Da

Neighborhood-2

10. I was diagnosed with Leukemia at age six. At that time, only 50% of the children actually survived. Those that did survive, suffered nerve and muscular damage from the chemotherapy and the radiation therapy. According to doctors, I am not supposed to be able to lift my knee any higher than my waist. I spend months in a hospital and had to be home schooled one year. I also survived cancer twice as an adult.

9. I come from a long line of eccentric thinkers. Stanley Kubrick is my paternal grandmother’s cousin. My father’s uncle helped develop sonar and had an all mathematical equation correspondence with Albert Einstein.

8. I speak Guangdonghua (Cantonese), Mandarin and some Shanghai dialect, and can read and write both traditional and simplified Chinese characters. The Guangdonghua was basically self taught. When I met Chan Tai San, he spoke no English and I spoke no Chinese. Stephen Laurette spoke some, but most of it was on the job training.

7. My father didn’t want to sign me up for martial arts lessons and my mother wanted to put me in the closes school, a karate school run by Alex Sternberg. However I had dome some reading and had found Pong Ki Kim’s school. It was a train ride away, but I insisted. My parents only signed me up for the yellow belt program, but I went every day and eventually they signed me up for a year.

6. I have a master’s degree in Chinese history from the Elliott School of International Affairs at George Washington University. I also have 60 credits and “ABD” (All But Dissertation) towards a PhD at City University in American history. I taught both Chinese and American history at several universities.

5. I neither practiced martial arts nor taught it for two years, after having an argument with Chan Tai-San and as I went to graduate school. I started practicing again when I saw a flyer at GWU for an informal Jeet Kune Do/Muay Thai sparring group.

4. I have published more than 50 articles on the martial arts in both the martial arts industry press and in academic journals. Many of these articles have been translated into foreign languages and re-distributed. This wide distribution of my articles also means that there has been a wide distribution of a few of my errors, including the correct name of the monastery Chan Tai San was raised in.

3. I initially didn’t want to even meet Chan Tai-San. When I did agree, I thought I would learn a few “pretty forms” since I didn’t know many forms at the time. Ironic.

2. I was never a natural at anything I learned. It literally took me ten years to learn how to do a side kick correctly. In fact, I think the fact I had to work so hard for all my skills is a major reason I am a good coach. I learned to break things down and how to conceptualize them.

1. I never wanted to be a martial arts teacher. Despite having taught people since age 16, I initially thought I was going to be a doctor. At 17, my Taekwondo teacher wanted me to run his second school, I laughed and told him I was going to college! Chan Tai-San asked me when I was going to open a full time school and I told him I wasn’t. He asked me if I was going to throw away everything he taught me. I went to graduate school. Life isn’t always the way you think it is….

Meet the new disciple, same as the old disciple (don’t get fooled again)

4 Jan

I am one of the senior disciples of the late Chan Tai-San. I spent 16 years training with him, was adopted in the formal “baai si” ceremony, taught his “public classes” for the first four years and was his main translator when he traveled the country. I met Chan Tai-San in 1986. If you don’t believe me, you could look at what Chan Tai San wrote in his own handwriting.

581646_3932602494014_290400358_n

You can also see my Baai Si “red book”. Anyone who claims they were adopted in Baai Si should be able to show you a copy of one of these. They should also tell you who their witnesses were. One of my witnesses was the well known Hung Ga master Frank Yee (Yee Chi Wai).

1908485_10202098007092203_3435635105194145482_n
baai si page one
last page of red book

Maybe hand written letters and/or foreign languages isn’t your style. Maybe you can’t read Chinese. The other thing I have going for me is the instructor’s certificate that the North American Chinese Martial Arts Federation (NACMAF) gave me after they asked Chan Tai-San to verify I was in fact what I said I was. It was issued in 1994 and says I had eight years of training with Chan Tai-San.

24149_1161052526997_593140_n

Anyone who trained with Chan Tai-San prior to 1990 trained either on Henry Street or at the Chan Family Association. The Henry street location burned down.

2702_81552070559_3927413_n

Above is a picture of the Chan Family Association which had a Mo Gwoon on the top floor.

135345_1395838236493_1099486_o

Above is a picture of Chan Tai-San with Stephan Laurette (who introduced me to Chan Tai San), “Gil” who was a student at Hong Luck in Toronto and was there to visit, Steve Ventura and myself. The last guy is named Juan. If anyone ever tells you they trained with Chan Tai San prior to 1990, ask them to show you pictures of the Chan Family Association.

8329_152580325559_215749_n

In the October 1989 issue of Inside Kung Fu Magazine, Laurette and I co-authored an article on Chan Tai-San and his lineage of Lama Pai. This is just a time frame issue, but you’ll notice that only Vetura, Laurette and myself are listed. People like Michael Parella, Stephen Innocenzi and Chris Jurak of course appeared in later articles and are legitimate Chan Tai San disciples. But as a matter of fact, they all joined the group after 1989.

4541_101257635559_1403533_n

In order to write the 1989 article, Laurrette and I had to ask Chan Tai-San all sorts of things. We wanted to know WHERE he had studied. So he wrote the name of the monastery in the dirt with a stick. Chinese isn’t easy, especially for foreigners teaching themselves! We mis-read the character as “green” but it was a mistake and we figured it out later looking at the MANY things Chan Tai San later wrote like the writing above. There never was any “green cloud” it was always “clear cloud” and we have hundreds of examples of Chan Tai San’s writing as evidence of this.

537701_3932603454038_1669625757_n

Chan Tai San did NOT teach beginners. This is what the public classes were for. The public classes were held on Lafayette street and there are a large number of photos taken at that location. I was the chief instructor of the public classes so people who wanted to train with Chan Tai-San first became my student and if they passed muster then were accepted by Chan Tai-San.

29271_1204173484994_2019344_n

In the 1990’s there were over 50 articles about Chan Tai-San and Lama Pai published in various martial arts magazines. Almost all of them were written by me and I appear in them. However, you will note that when Chan Tai San was given the “cover story” for Inside Kung Fu, Stephen Innocenzi co-wrote that piece with me.

2702_81430100559_3246912_n

I can tell you who studied with Chan Tai-San directly, and who didn’t. I can tell you what they learned and how well they learned it. One obvious point is that Chan Tai San SPOKE NO ENGLISH. So anyone who starts telling you Chan Tai San stories had better have a pretty good conversational Cantonese.

602138_3932924622067_1879111743_n

For a very long time, I have been interested only in my version of Chan Tai San’s teachings and in teaching the way I wanted to. However, with the growing amount of crap and lies being put out there, it was time to correct all this.

front cover art small

BUY THE BOOK AT https://www.createspace.com/4891253

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,877 other followers

%d bloggers like this: